The Chatter Box
By Deborah Bennett

I contemplated murder this week. The object of my frustration, however, was not a living, breathing organism but a lifeless instrument whose most notable attribute is the ability to inflict excruciating back pain that lingers for days.

I am talking about my kitchen mop. Whoever invented the mop was evidently about four feet tall and suffering from a humpback affliction, which is exactly how I feel after using one for only a few minutes. The things are obviously modern day remnants of equipment used in medieval torture chambers!

I have searched everywhere for a mop with a "long" handle so that I don't have to bend over parallel to the floor to use the thing. Such a device does not exist. I am beginning to believe that all mops have been purposely designed to create backaches. Perhaps the inventor of the mop also had a financial interest in the manufacture of pain medication. If so, he is a billionaire by now!

I say "he" because I am certain that a woman would never have designed such a flawed device. Since the female residents of a home are the primary users of mops, a female would have known better after only a few swipes with the instrument.

I have tried leaving my mop on the back porch with hopes that the dogs would drag it off to some place where I would not be able to find it. No such luck. Even the dogs don't want a kitchen mop! I can't say that I blame them. It is a wicked device!

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Millen Woman's Club and Millen Better Hometown have applied for a $5,000 grant from Hamburger Helper Corporation to help fund improvements to the park behind the Millen Community House. A major factor in securing the grant is evidence of community support. You can show that support by going to the website http:// www.myhometownhelper.com. Click on "Find a Project." Select "Georgia" and type in "Millen." Click on "Millen Community House Park."

There is a place to make a comment in support of the project. Please help by taking a few minutes to do this. The deadline for making comments is Sept. 30.

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You may have noticed several sports articles and photos in the newspaper in recent weeks by Mike Dann. Mike has covered school and recreational sports for us in the past, and we are delighted to have him do so again. Welcome back, Mike.

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Happy birthday this week to: Pearl Myers, Minnie Bell Sherrod, Charles (Jack) Burke, Bobbye Cobb, Laurie Fleming, Eddie Williams, Mark Frison, Matthew Frison, Eric Wilson, Terra Wommack, Steven Golden, Jason Boynton, Paul Godbee, Myrt Newton, Adrian Rhodes, Kenny Williams, Shelby Burke, Foye Knight, Daisy Edenfield and Vivian Davis.

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Celebrating wedding anniversaries this week are: Mr. and Mrs. C.J. Waters and Mr. and Mrs. Nathan Brown.

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Military Active Duty List: Airman First Class Charles S. Woods, Sheppard Air Force Base, Texas; Capt. Andrew P. Thomas, U.S. Marines, 2nd Marine Division, F.A.S.T. Company, Bahrain, Persian Gulf; Stuart Burrus, U.S. Air Force, BAFB, LA; SPC 4 Travis D. Motes, 1st Calvary Division, Camp Taji, Iraq; Capt. Donald Slade Burke, Travis Air Force Base, Fairfield, Calif.; SPC Grade E4 Arthur Lamont Milton Jr., HHC 1-36 Infantry Support, Friedberg, Germany; Staff Sgt. Gilbert C. Sheppard III, 48th Brigade, 118th Field Artillery, Ft. Stewart; Petty Officer 3rd Class Jamie A. Yager, U.S. Navy, Marine Corps Base Hawaii; Petty Chief Officer Andy D. Crosby, U.S. Navy, Elroy Destroyer, Norfolk, Va.; Stephanie Crosby, R.N., U.S. Navy, Lafayette Destroyer; LCPL Dwain "Cade" Lee, 1st Marine Division Combat Service Support Group II Security Element, ArRamadi, Iraq; Jimmy Cooper, U.S. Army National Guard, 878th Engineering Battalion-Augusta, Persian Gulf ; 1st Lt. J.R. Taylor, 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Iraq; SPC. Daniel Stuart, 18th MEDCOM, 121 General Hospital, Seoul, Korea; Jeffrey Sweat, U.S. Navy, USS Kauffman, MM3 59/E-Division, AGang, Norfolk, Va.; Cpl. Larry Lamont Clark, U.S. Marine Corp, 2nd Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C. Bagdad, Iraq; Khan Young, U.S. Navy, U.S.S. Kitty Hawk, Persian Gulf; Robert Milton Jr., E-3, U.S. Army, Ft. Stewart, Hinesville, Ga., Mission Kuwait; Arnold R. Mosley, 2nd Lt., U.S. Air Force, Randolph AFB, Texas; and Debra A. Mosley, Tech. Sgt., U.S. Air Force, Randolph AFB,